another parent thread

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Aych Es Vee, May 12, 2015.

  1. My wife and I do things differently, no schedule like you have, but also no weird 'alternative parenting' that you referenced with the music show example. We just fit the baby care stuff into our day where it fits, and never worry about schedules. I feel like we have a lot less parenting stress than some of our friends who are all nazi-ish about this kind of stuff.
  2. Having kids is great, my wife and I have really been enjoying it. I never understood the mentality of not wanting kids. I can appreciate that doing something with ones life that truly benefits culture and society, such as devoting their life to art, or curing diseases, or bringing water to 3rd world villages, or any other life pursuit of that scale would not jive with a family dynamic. But if you're not having kids, and you're not bettering the world, what are you really doing with your life? You're just using up resources while waiting to die.

    That having been said, I would say that most people who have kids probably shouldn't, and are better off just waiting to die anyway. Don't listen to anyone around you. Having kids and raising a family is something only you can decide how to go about. There's many ways of living a family life, and most people seem to prefer making it difficult for themselves. My wife and I haven't had any of the dumb problems that all the hurpadurps said we would have, and our lifestyle really hasn't changed at all. Our house is not baby central, we still work out regularly, we have time to cook fabulous meals every day, and we still have friends over or go out to visit people on a weekly basis. Since our daughter was born I've purchased a second motorcycle, and we are all going to Europe this summer. Life hasn't changed, except now we bring a baby along with us.

    The world is plenty populated, but most people are shit. Raising your own child is your chance to mold and shape a mind into one that will improve the populace and carry your legacy into the next generation.
  3. everybody has a different way to raise childs, and nobody has the right receipe.

    funny you referencing nazy stuff also <A BORDER="0" HREF=""><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="pitlane/emoticons/smile.gif"></A>
  4. There is no right or wrong well-intentioned way to raise a child.

    There is, however, definitely an easy and a hard way.
  5. Very true, and in the end, you can either adapt the child to your living style or adapt your living style to the child's need

    mine just going above 3h for its siesta right now its awesome
  6. I know what youre saying, which is why I know we're are selfish. We live our day to day without any particular plans, and we love it that way.

    Go out to a restaurant? ok
    Go to the movies? done
    Go to the water park? cool
    Search for any good flight deals to wherever and book one? DONE

    Our plan is to adjust the kid into our life "as much as possible", but we know things will be totally different. Our overseas trips that we do once or twice a year? Well, kid is going to cost us an extra plane ticket, cant miss out on too much school, and might not appreciate anything we see.
    Everything we do will cost more money, and take longer. We cant just pop up the road late at night to get some frozen yoghurt, because kid will be in bed. Everytime we go anywhere, it takes time making sure hes dressed and ready, then getting him into the car and strapped in. When they're young its feeding and sleeping times, when they're a bit older, they need a bathroom every 15 minutes!

    I'm not sure why so many want this, and think we are weird for not?
    A family member of mine always wanted kids, and never considered any of the above, had 2 children, and now shes so unhappy with her life. And has expressed on many occasions how she is so jealous of us.
    And I also never understood why many people say that they had kids because they were incomplete as a family, or it was the next step in their relationship. Makes it sound like they didnt have a great relationship to start with.
    Or they want little versions of themselves and impart their own self onto their child. It seems like people forget that their children will each be their own person, who may be nothing like you at all.
    Pretty much everyone I know that wants kids, is never around them, and have no little ones in their family.
    We never not-wanted children until we were around so many. 10 nieces and nephews, many cousins with many kids, and at least 10 other friends with kids. Oldest is about 10, and plenty of babies. So its nothing that people really say to us, we actually see it all for ourselves on almost a daily basis. At least 5 days a week we are around kids.

    I think you're very lucky in your situation, and that is awesome. Maybe you basically already had a lifestyle that could accommodate a baby to start with? Maybe you're parenting is top notch? Maybe you won the jackpot with an easy child? All of the above?
    I actually had a friend that thought he was an amazing parent until they had their second child, and realised that the first child was just great on his own accord, lol!

    Upon saying all that, I do believe life will change, and I would hate to be oblivious to that, but I feel/hope that we adjust too and it all becomes normal/easy anyway. (because its going to have to).

    The public healthcare system over here allows us free access to a psych, so we decided to tal about all these issues with one, to see if we were being weird, but he actually said 'I cant actually help you with anything, because I'm here to help people with irrational and illogical thinking, and all your thoughts are not either. You're only problem is over-thinking them.'

    Not gonna lie, their certainly is a part of me thats excited. When I think about why that is, I cant put my finger on it. Instinct?
  7. I hate seeing kids rule peoples lives. Its like 'ah, whos the authority figure here?'

    So weird watching parents be servants instead of parents.
  8. thanks! Thats what Im hoping with the age gap between some of the cousins. Plenty of babysitters! haha
  9. Just beat'em up a little bit
  10. 21 months
  11. You'll understand when it happens. But in the meantime, how old are you? You sound young, bro. A man gets bored of going to restaurants and getting ice cream at odd hours. Seriously, there is way more to life than wining and dining. Going to restaurants and traveling on a whim are not life priorities. They are just 'nice to haves'. Once you've done enough of it, it gets old like anything else. The key is, are you still gonna be able to have a family once you're done indulging in wine, food, and poorly planned travel? If you wait too long, your wife's eggs will expire.

    Well luckily for you, you're gonna have a kid anyway, so you don't have to find out the hard way.
  12. When I'm a parent, I'm going to have the advantage of making conclusions based on how my brother raises his kids (virtually no limits) and how my sister does it (too many limits). My kids are going to rock. Not really looking forward to it, though.
  13. Well im not that young. Almost 30. The more money I make as I get older, the more I enjoy those things.

    Guess I'll have to trust you! lol

    Really starting to feel him kick now, I mean, I can feel him with my hand. Which put a smile on my face. <A BORDER="0" HREF=""><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="pitlane/emoticons/smile.gif"></A>
  14. Seeing the baby for the first time was an emotional experience for me, but what really makes me the happiest is when my daughter wakes up in the morning and sees me for the first time of the day, and lights up with this great big baby smile. That's something special.
  15. i even have this with other kids. friend of mine has 2 kids. when i come to his house they are always happy to see me. feels good.
  16. Went to the doc on Monday for her first ultrasound and we heard a heartbeat. That was a pretty thrilling moment
  17. cool moment indeed, but wait for the kicks!
  18. good to hear, I wish you the best
  19. You call me a dirty spic one second and the next wish me the best
  20. Welp, that's what psychopaths are like.
  21. That's Hemi for you. Don't mind him. Just think some positive vibe for you new born, that's more important.
  22. I think it's more worrying that he doesn't want to kill niggers <A BORDER="0" HREF=""><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="pitlane/emoticons/sad.gif"></A>
  23. You can still travel to pretty out of the way places with young kids, and it enhances your travel experiences in ways you'd never really think beforehand. Yeah, it costs 1 person extra so you can't do it as frequently, but young kids love the hell out of new and exciting things, you really don't have to worry about them not enjoying anything they see. It opens their eyes to a whole other side of the world I think is pretty important for young kids.
  24. You provoked me on some subjects and mocked me several times not in a way I liked. But I have nothing against you personnally as I told you in the past. If I tell that I wish you the best then it is the case.

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