Clarkson rips into the BMW 1-series

Discussion in 'European Cars' started by Nicklin, Dec 12, 2004.

  1. #1 Nicklin, Dec 12, 2004
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 25, 2016
  2. "I have been accused, in recent years, of having it in for BMW. There was even some talk, after my recent review of the dreadful X3, that I would not be allowed any more press demonstrators. And this is why I’ve devoted the entire column this week to a test of the 1-series rather than tagging it on to the end of a rant about cheese.

    And it’s why I’m choosing the words for my conclusion with even more care than usual. So here goes. The 1-series is crap."

  3. Clarkson is God again. Finally a motoring journalist with a real opinion instead of all those filthy bmw @rse kissers.

  4. he used to love BMW's before they strayed out of the big RWD sedan sector.

  5. It's the ugliest BMW I've ever seen, seen a few driving now and I keep thinking that Bangle has a chromosome disorder.
  6. he doesn't hate all BMW, just watch his new DVD 'hot metal' where has adores tehe M3 CSL
  7. "The 1-series is crap."

    God bless Clarkson.
  8. 20k in BPS is quite a lot, I was expecting it to be that much is USD, considering the 325i here starts at $27k. Either way, I think the 1er is the best looking hatch around, now if we get some regular tires on it it should be an excellent car.
  9. This is the BMW that started out as the Rover 45 replacement right and was kept by BMW when they sold Rover?
  10. What? 7,9seconds for the 0-100 is a decent time.
  11. But that's with the engine that makes the car sound like a canal boat.
  12. For a $14,000 FWD car like the Focus or Civic.
  13. Nuff said
  14. I love sniffpetrol
  16. Harsh. But genious.
  17. I love the way hes so blunt and just straight up

    he's right though, that thing is hideous
  18. some of what hes saying is correct, but a lot of it is contradiction and a clear intention to express his resent towards the company. allow me to pick apart this mans brainstem.

    he clearly expresses a fondness of an older BMW mentality where there were engines, body styles, and you pieced together what you wanted. he gets that out of the way in the begining. but then they "changed the recipe" with 4x4s, american production plants, diesels, and convertables. he doesnt like that, but heres the problem. he cant b!tch about those cars because each and everyone one was a spearhead on the market and a HUGE success. the X5, the Z3, and all their diesel engines did or are doing fine. how stupid does someone sound when they b!tch about the 3-series? pretty damn stupid, cause everyone else likes it. theres nothing wrong with it. if in 1994, some local newspaper critic said Forest Gump was sh!t, hed be out on his ass! so wait until a new car, like the X3, comes along and talk shit on that before its made a impact in the minds of people who adore it.

    then he said it lost design cues, but thats absolutely false. BMWs went from a bit boxy to very curvy, but very little essence ala BMW was lost. kidney grilles and the hofmeister kink make it into the 1-series, but he complains that the company is losing their image with Bangle so is this a problem with the car or a company once loved gone arwy that bothers him?

    "Before Bangle, most BMWs adhered to the same set of rules. They had a lean-forward shark’s nose, they had the double-kidney grille, they had grey paint and then there was that little kink on the rear pillar. It’s called the Hofmeister kink, after the man who invented it, and it gives the car an aggressive, lean-forward stance..." "..Now, though, all of these design cues have been lost in a sea of planes and creases that probably play well in design circles. But in the real world they don’t look modern or sharp. They look daft." i find at least two of those three thing in every current model, so are they really lost or is this man just insane? he thinks they look silly, but thats just him. hes a critic. hes scared of new things. hes an elitist. critics liked the movie Alexander, but it tanked at the box office. critics shunned National Treasure but its been #1 for the last 3 weeks. kissing a critics dick seems pretty useless to me. i think the car looks great and there are scores of people who agree with me.

    "The advertisements tell us, endlessly, that unlike any other family hatchback on the market it has rear-wheel drive. And that’s great. Rear-wheel drive is a significant part of BMW’s DNA." what? i thought they had lost all their motif?

    "But how long will it be, I wonder, before the 1-series does for BMW what Freddie Laker did for air travel? Turns something glamorous and exciting into a “win free save!” orgy of packaged mass transportation." hes saying that the 1-series causes BMW to loose some of the status symbol, a car for everybody and not the well off people whos "neighbours will be impressed. The curtains will twitch. Men will offer their daughters to your sons.
    ", but then he turns around and says you should go out and buy a focus of a VW because the BMW price is to exclusive!

    "It’s not a bad diesel by any standards, but come on. Where’s the fun in a car that sounds like a canal boat?" ah! the oportunity to hate on the diesels thats have done so well. he couldnt do it in the 5s or the 3s but his chance came with the 1. the chance to take his predisposed hate and turn it into something publicized.

    but i wont go completely off on him. theres little space in the back, it cost to much, and it needs more power. understandable. its a rare thing that a new model car comes out year one as perfect as it leaves. that doesnt stop those from being great models. my fiero is a great example. in 84, people made fun that it would overheat, but in 88 it was such a radical seller, it was hurting vette sales.

    end of my tearing into clarkson article.
  19. I don't read what eurotrash like Clarkson writes, because he's eurotrash.
  20. But then again, so is BMW.
  21. 2998ccCSL, instead of quoting your entire post I'll jsut reply here.

    I'll be the first to admit Clarkson says what he does firstly, to make an impact and secondly because thats how he feels about the car. Most of the time these 2 things happen to be the same and he gets away with it, now and again you do get the feeling he's saying it just to be heard.

    But ... I think what he was getting at with the double kidney grille and hofmeister kink being 'lost' was not that BMW had forgetten to use them but that they were lost in amongst angles, curves, 'flame surfaces' and Bangle. They have lost the impact and purity they once had and are now just part of an over complicated, messed up design.

    As far as the price and market segment goes Clarkson may contradict himself slightly, but so do BMW, why make a 5-door family hatch aimed to appeal to the great unwashed and market it as a competitor to the Focus and Golf then over-charge for it, Clarkson is no more confusing than BMW here.
  22. Pwn


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