Today I realized how much capacity I have to love

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Ron Simmons, Mar 25, 2008.

  1. This is a honest to heart post, no trolling/gtr bashing.

    But yeah today I realized how far I can go for the ones I love and care for. Its a crushing experience but an awesome feeling. The world seems new to me and I have new feelings ive never had before.

    Its unbeliveable, i dont even care how much people bash this post when i post it here.

    For me, today is the best day of my 23 year old life.
  2. So what did you do you just called going far?
  3. is that what it feels like to come out of the closet, once and for all?
  4. Thanks for the details.
  5. Probably some wrestling crap.
  6. 2nd account. ban.
  7. Great story. Now tell us what the **** you did.
  8. Everyone in the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly was. Ugly was the resident tomcat. Ugly loved three things: fighting, eating garbage, and well, he loved to love, shall we say.

    The combination of these things and a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly. To start, he had only one eye; a gaping hole on the other side where the other eye should be. He was also missing an ear on the side of the missing eye, and his left foot looked like it was badly broken at one time, and had healed at an unnatural angle, making him look as if he were always turning a corner. His tail was lost long ago, leaving a small stub that he would always jerk and twitch.

    Ugly would have been a dark gray tabby, striped, except for the sores covering his head, neck, and shoulders with thick yellowing scabs. Every time someone saw Ugly the reaction was the same. "That is one UGLY cat!"

    All the children were warned not to touch him. The adults thew rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted water at him, or shut his paws in the door when he tried to come in their homes.

    Ugly always had the same reaction. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand their getting soaked until you gave up. If you threw things at him, he would curl his lanky body around your feet in forgiveness. Wherever he spied children, he would come running meowing frantically and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love. If you ever picked him up he would immediately begin suckling on your shirt, earrings, or whatever else he could find.

    One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbors' huskies. They did not respond kindly. Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his screams, and I rushed to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was obvious Ugly's poor life was near its end.

    Ugly lay in a wet circle. His back legs and lower back were twisted out of shape, and a huge tear in his fur ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home I could hear him wheezing and gasping, and could feel him struggling. I must be hurting him terribly, I thought.

    Then I felt a familiar tugging, sucking sensation on my ear. Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying was trying to suckle my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand with his head, then he turning his one golden eye towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battle-scarred cat was asking only for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.

    At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me to relieve his pain.

    Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion that a thousand books ever could, and for that I will always be thankful.

    He was scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply.

    Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked, beautiful. I did too. But not anymore.

    I will always try to be Ugly.
  9. <A BORDER="0" HREF=""><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="pitlane/emoticons/sad.gif"></A>
  10. Basically helped someone who her own family had deserted in the time of need and helped her through about one and a half years of shit to her own feet. pushed myself to the edge in the process.
  11. It is a good feeling to help somebody back onto their feet. I did this with my best friend, who was close to suicide at one point, and is now a 4.0 student who will get his degree next year. Helping somebody through hardship brings you closer together than anything else.
  13. LP FOREVER!!!
    ~ Nat

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